Finally a new email from dad that’s worth posting. Lately it’s been all anti-Obama propaganda. Here we go:

Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly….

The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Cooter and Gomer.

The three men had always done everything together.
Cooter arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet,
Cooter said, ‘Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad.. You better roll him over..’
The mortician rolled him over and Cooter said, ‘Nope, ain’t Bubba.’

The mortician thought this was rather strange.
So he brought Gomer in to confirm the identity of the body.
Gomer looked at the body and said, ‘Yup, he’s pretty well burnt up…
Roll him over.’
The mortician rolled him over and Gomer said, ‘No, it ain’t Bubba.’

The mortician asked, ‘How can you tell?’
Gomer said, ‘Well, Bubba had two assholes.’
‘What? He had two assholes?’ asked the mortician.
‘Yup, we never seen ‘em, but everybody used to say:

‘There’s Bubba with them two assholes

This is literally a ‘church signs’ debate, being played out in a southern town, between the Catholic church and a (fundamentalist) Presbyterian church that face each other across a street.

From top to bottom shows you the response and counter-response over time.

From all these pic’s, one seems to form the impression that the Catholics are approaching this with a sense of humor, while the Presbyterians are actually taking it quite seriously!

Read the rest…

Okay, I’m cheating. This is actually an email from my brother, but funny non-the-less.

We’ve all been there but don’t like to admit it. We’ve all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below.. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. Read the rest…

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00. When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $ 5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.  Read the rest…

When Chuck was a young cowboy in Montana he bought a horse from a farmer for $100.  The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.  The next day the farmer drove up and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.”  Chuck replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.”  The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”  Chuck said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.”  The farmer asked, “What ya gonna do with him?”  Chuck said, “I’m going to raffle him off.”  The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!”  Chuck said, “Sure I can, watch me.  I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.” Read the rest…

This is a new section that I am starting that I’m catagorizing as “Emails From Dad”. I don’t recieve a lot of random emails because most people know the amount of email that I have to sift through on a daily basis, so they don’t bother. My dad however, likes to send me random and sometimes gross emails regardless. I know that some of this is old, but I would still like to post some of the funnier ones. This is the first installment. Read the rest…